Mario's Movie Meter or MMM Explained

    I recently got to experience something that all bloggers dream would occur to them, I met one of my readers in real life and got some real life critique and input on what I should write more about, what I should change, improve and so forth, let's call him MC for writing purposes. So MC was talking about the movie reviews, how they were missing something crucial, a rating system. MC went on to describe the many different ways one could go about creating a rating system and stated that without one the whole of the review just seemed lacking, like there was no real conclusion because in the end the reader doesn't really know what the rating really means. This troubled me and I had to concede that he had a point, and it spawned a conversation on names for this epic meter, MC came up with the triple M, Mario's Movie Meter, I instantly loved it, it's simple, and catchy, it's not fancy and corny, thus I was down. So without further ado here is an explanation of the Triple M, may this be your guide for all future movie reviews done in this blog in the future.

   MMM Rating: Instant Classic (I.C.)

     
  Sometimes in rare days, usually over the summer, there comes a movie that not only stands out among the rest but elevates itself to such a level that it cannot be rated anything but an Instant Classic. This is a rare occurrence and will not be a rating you'll see used much, but it does exist. The movies within this list are not perfect movies, these movies are not like the 5 star movies in dealing with how Oscar worthy the  movie was, these movies are in a different scale. Key examples are movies like "The Godfather", "Star Wars", "The Big Lebowki", all three movies differ in genre and style, and all three movies have their flaws, but all three movies are classics, they are beyond the five point scale, these are the movies that will live on forever and deserve much more respect.

   MMM Rating: 5/5

   The best way to describe a five star movie is to name a few titles that best encompass this particular rating, movies like "Shawshank Redemption", "Gladiator", "American Beauty", "Shakespeare In Love", "Midnight In Paris" and "Saving Private Ryan" are all a good balance of what a five star movie looks like. These are the movies that capture us, that dominate our souls for the whole two hours of showtime. Not only are these movies well directed and written, but these movies have a fantastic cast of brilliant actors and actresses that have come together to create gold. Five star movies are the type that you buy and add to your collection, the type you defend when someone speaks ill of it, the one you feel attached to even after just watching it from the theater. A five star rating is a big deal.

  MMM Rating 4/5

     A good example to define this rating is "The Book Of Eli". The movie has a good cast, a good theme, it has everything one needs in order to have a successful movie but in the end it leaves you craving for a little more, a little lack of cheese at times or a little more background on the theme we are seeing. These movies are great, amazing even, these are the ones you definitely go watch in theaters and maybe add it to your collection of movie if the price drops under fifteen dollars. Though these movies are great and though they capture your attention, they just lack the necessary magic found in five star rating movies, it isn't a big deal though, you enjoyed yourself all the way through, it was a good time, just not a stellar "I'm going to watch this movie ten more times" kind of vibe.

  MMM Rating 3/5

     "The Amazing Spiderman" is a perfect example of a three star movie. It's a movie with a good cast but not a great one, with a nice story not a brilliant one, which entertains you fully but does not wow you in any way, it's definitely the kind of movie you would watch again if it came on TV but would think twice before buying unless you found it at a Walmart five dollar bin, this doesn't speak ill of the movie, it just means that this was a fun movie but not a great one, it contained all the elements one would need in order to be entertained for the duration of the movie but afterward there was no firework that went off in your soul, there wasn't this need to watch this again or talk about it insensibly. These are still good movies, in a "nice" sense, you will never see a three star movie win an Oscar, but you will be entertained when they come on TV on a Saturday afternoon and relieve you of your boredom.

  MMM Rating 2/5

        For this category just include *every Jason Statham movie here* and you'll come to understand what it takes to be a two star movie. These movies aren't good, they don't have a good plot, the acting is overdone and cheesy but even though the movie itself isn't fantastic you still are entertained by what is happening on the screen. Let's take "Crank" for example, the movie is absurd, Jason is playing himself again and killing everyone in sight, he jumps from cars, he gets banged up to a ridiculous degree and still wins in the end, it's obnoxious from beginning to end, and in the end of it all there is still an enjoyment that can come from watching it. Mind you, this is not the type of movie one would buy, or re-watch at the theaters, that's for sure, but this is one of those movies that even though it violates everything a good movie should be, it still entertains you, even at a primal level. So, two star rating, think Jason Statham.

   MMM rating 1/5

     I personally think that one star movies are the hardest to pin down, for there are clear choices of movies that are one star and some that should get negative stars, but for the sake of keeping this rating system reasonable I'm going to lump "Chupacabra Massacre", "Gigli", "Troll 2" and "Furry Vengeance" all into this singular rating. These are the movies that are so bad that you can't help but walk out of the theater and get your money back. There is only one place that I can see these movies being any "good" ( I use that term loosely in this example) and that is if you are having a "bad movie night" with some friends and want a bad enough movie that it entertains you all while giving you some laughs in the process. This is the bottom of the barrel, it's a rating I wish I could use sparingly, but Hollywood does like to produce garbage so it can't be helped.

   So this concludes the explanation to the triple M scale, from now on I'll include a link to this article in every movie review ever posted here, just in case you need a reference to what I mean when I say a movie is a three star MMM movie. The scale has been set, now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

   Love from your humble blogger,

Directors On The Move: Must Know Updates And Rumors

     The month of April has its up sides but when it comes to movies there really isn't much happening throughout the month which is a horrible thing, specially in light of exams being on the horizon and the need for an escape from regular activities being ever present due to stress. April is the last month before we start getting a series of blockbuster films starting with May 04th where we'll start this whole thing off with "The Avengers", its less than a month away, this is going to be good. Late April does offer us some better movies but for right now we get movies like "Lockout" which should feature Mark Wahlberg or Jason Statham but  does not which means that there are no redeeming factors to this brash action movie, not to worry though we do get a Statham movie later this month called "Safe" We don't want to ruin the plot of this movie but it's another Statham movie, which pretty much tells you the plot. On to this week's must know movie news.

   Stoller's New Comedy

     Jason Segel, Emily Blunt, Chris Pratt and Alison Brie, need we say more? On the last week of April we will start to get some good movies, this being the first one on the list. The story revolves around Segel and Blunt's characters as they get engaged and tracks all theirs difficulties throughout the whole process of preparing a wedding. The movie is directed by Nicholas Stoller, he directed movies like "Get Him To The Greek" and "Forgetting Sarah Marshall", so this movie is sure to be a fun one. It was about time Stoller got Segel back on the big screen and delivered us another great comedy. Plus it's Jason Segel, the guy has not disappointed us yet, think "How I Met Your Mother" and "The Muppets", yeah, the guy is good. "The Five Year Engagement" will surely be another great success, we recommend you add this to your must watch list.

    Tarantino's Latest Project

   This week Tarantino finally gave us some more insight into his upcoming movie "Django Unchained", the movie centers around a slave who after being freed becomes a bounty hunter and is on his way to rescue his wife from a Mississippi plantation owner, knowing how Tarantino works this movie will surely be a blast. Tarantino did not pull any punches for this one gathering a long list of amazing actors to perform in this latest addition, actors like Leonardo DiCaprio, Samuel L. Jackson, Christoph Waltz, Kurt Russell, Jamie Fox, and Kerry Washington, an amazing cast for sure. The movie should be coming out during Christmas time and is a project that we'll be sure to talk about again, you know something good and different is coming when Tarantino is involved.

    Ridley Scott's 2013Project Already In Talk

   If Ridley is not on the top of your radar list then we advise you to add him to it, here is man whose career deserves full attention. Ridley's latest movie "The Counselor" will be releasing sometime in 2013, not much about the movie is known as of yet except that it involves a lawyer and drug trafficking. The big rumor going around this week is that Brad Pitt, Javier Bardem and Michael Fassbender will all be performing side by side in this thriller. Though not confirmed there is talk of Angelina also being involved in this project, the first rumor was that Natalie Portman was to have the role but there are no conclusive news about it all as of yet, as soon as we hear more you'll hear more. If you are unfamiliar with Ridley Scott (God forbid) here is a sample list of some of his movies that should keep you busy this weekend, "Robin Hood", "Body Of Lies", "American Gangster", "Gladiator", "Blade Runner" and the upcoming gem "Prometheus" which looks fantastic.

   Burton Is Back With More Johnny

   Tim Burton just recently unveiled his upcoming vampire comedy "Dark Shadows" which will be featuring (Burton's favorite) Johnny Depp. There are some people who have begun to critique this movie already, for some reason there is a strong online following against Tim Burton, we don't think it matters much, Tim is still a brilliant guy and he has been behind amazing projects in the past, Burton and Depp have worked together for years and know how to bring out the best work from each other, therefore this movie should be on your watch list, its as simple as that. "Dark Shadows" will come out this year May 11th, we recommend that you watch the preview above, it looks like its going to be a really funny movie. If for some odd reason you are unfamiliar with Tim Burton's work then please do yourself a kindness and go watch some of his movies, we recommend "Batman", "Edward ScissorHands", "Ed Wood", "Sleepy Hollow", "The Nightmare Before Christmas" and "Big Fish", there are more of his movies we could add to this list but that would take up too much space, Burton's got a lot of good movies.

 "Catching Fire" Rumor Mill

  We mentioned previously this week the fact that Lionsgate lost their director for the sequel in the "Hunger Games" trilogy "Catching Fire" and how this could be a good thing or a really bad thing, turns out this might be a really really good thing after all. There are rumors going around right now that there are three directors in talks about taking the movie over, the first is Alfonso Cuaron who is known for movies like "Harry Potter And The Prisoner of Azkaban" and "Children of Men", the second is Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu who directed "21 Grams" and "Babel", and thirdly the one and only David Cronenberg whose career is vast and impressive, he's worked on movies like "The Fly", "Scanners", "Eastern Promises", "A History Of Violence" and a ton more. The bottom line is this, we have three titans fighting for this movie, which means that "Catching Fire" will be the "Empire Strikes Back" of the "Hunger Games" series, meaning that it'll probably blow our minds and be amazing. We'll be watching this story closely so as soon as we get more updates you'll get more updates.

   Well consider yourselves updated on important movie announcements and rumors that occurred this week. We hope this Friday is a great one for you and that this weekend might be restful. If you can't think of anything to do for this weekend then we recommend that you look into some of these directors, they will all blow your minds.

Love from your humble blogger,

2012: Sequels and Remakes Strike Again *Take 2*

    Sequels and remakes aren't all bad, there are some of them that still capture our hearts and give us hope for the future of sequels. So far this year we have received a solid list of announced titles, one we are all looking for I'm sure, with titles like "The Hunger Games" and "Chronicle" coming out how can one not be excited about what this year will bring. A side note, we will not be covering Twilight within this article, though we are about to be faced with the fourth movie this series does not apply as a sequel, for its a series, the books were written before the movies began to be released and the whole story was already developed, thus its not a sequel but a story told in parts, like "Lord Of The Rings" was a story told in parts, anyway, here we go:

   Superhero Movie Extravaganza

     We are being bombarded with superhero movies this year, some are original like "Chronicle" which comes out next week, but the majority of them are sequels or remakes. Let's start at the top shall we, the "Avengers" a sequel of sorts, here we have a combination of various other movies puzzled together over a period of time and thus creating a sequel, an elaborate sequel but a sequel none-of-the-less, this movie will be amazing, or so we hope. "Batman Rises" this actually happens to be the sequel of a remake, yeah Nolan rebooted the Batman series brilliantly, and thus we look forward to his conclusion this year, but don't forget that this was a sequel of a remake done well, a rarity. Finally we reach our webbed hero who desperately need a reboot after Toby did the whole emo Venom thing, "The Amazing Spider-man" will be coming out this year, complete with web shooters, Gwen Stacy and the Lizard as a villain, this movie looks legit, guess they figured that if the new ideas were bombing they should go back to the roots to get inspiration, a good move over all we think. 

   MIB III

    We have not had a "Men In Black" movie in a long time, the first one came out in 1997 just so you get the picture, yeah it's an old series but its a good one for sure. This is the role we all loved Will Smith playing in, the role that complimented movies like "Independence Day" and "Enemy Of The State" so well, and now we have old Will back doing another MIB, we can't wait. The preview looks really good and its being surrounded by a good cast which always helps, as long as they keep it simple like the first one and avoid tons of twists like the second one we feel that this movie will come out great. The great thing about the MIB series is the element of humor combined with action, we haven't had a good action movie that was centered around humor for a while, not slap-stick humor but intelligent humor, like the ones found in the first installment of this series. We can't wait for this movie, if you haven't seen the preview yet then do yourself a kindness and go watch it, it looks really good.

    Skyfall

   
     There was a time where we would receive a James Bond movie per year, those were good times, though we're ok with waiting two years for a Bond flick if Daniel Craig promises a repeat blockbuster performance he has shown us in the previous two Bond movies he has done, rather impressive really. One cannot help but be excited about "Skyfall" here we are seeing a complete evolution of the series taking into account our culture of today, our technology and so forth. Though many of us were skeptical about Daniel Craig being the new Bond we could not have braced ourselves for how awesome of a Bond he was, there were some minor quips with the last movie, like no gadgets, but that feels like a minor detail when you take into account the performance shown within the movie. One has only to watch some of the older Bond flicks to see how far we have come, truly a movie to look forward to.

      Oh The Brashness

   What year would be complete without some brash movies to entertain us along the way, this year we are being hit with the father of brashness, "Expendables 2". Before we even start talking about the movie let's review the cast: Liam Hemsworth, Jason Statham, Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Chuck Norris, Jet Li, Charisma Carpenter, Terry Crews, Dolph Lundgren, Randy Couture, and Scott Adkins, right, this movie perspires brashness to a level beyond understanding. There is one way that this movie could drive the nail home and that is if they had recruited Liam Neeson to this little brash party, surely that would have blown our minds even more so if they had included Steven Seagal to the cast as well, guess they are saving those and others for "Expendables 3", either way this movie is sure to be the brashest movie of the year, no way anyone could even compete.    

Would be the runner up for sure

    And there you have it, proof that not all sequels and remakes are a bad thing, so when you look at the upcoming movies list and begin to feel noxious by all the horrible sequels and remakes, remember that though those will cause us pain, that there are others out there that will bring us plenty of joy.  We also hope you liked the new look for the blog, we are growing more and more so thank you for your support.

  We hope you all had a fantastic week, and have a glorious weekend,

Love from your humble blogger,