Wednesday, September 19, 2012
How Having Good Friends Changed My Life
We've heard from our parents and teachers all our lives how having the right friends or keeping the right company can aid us in living a good life. This gets tiring after a while and in some cases it even brings about an extra added rebellion in us that causes us to go and make some friends that our parents and teachers do not approve of, this is a pretty standard rebellion among people of all ages. In the end of the day though they are right, it sucks but it's true, your friends do begin to define you, they are the ones that will either aid you in growing or be the ones to help you fail in life. Before you tune me out here, hear me out, these are some things I've learned in my own life and some friends I've had that have aided me in life in various ways.
One of many steps you can take to having good friends that will aid you in life is to find people that are better than you in aspects of life that you are bad in. This can vary from being able to talk to girls, to sports, to thinking deeply, to being a good student and so forth. This step is crucial, good friends are those that are always there for you and those that call you out when you're being dumb. If you only surround yourself with people who you are better than then you will have a tough time growing for they will probably never call you out on stuff, they'll just assume you're always being smart, being that you're better than them. It sounds silly, and in theory this might even sound shallow, but in practice this is generally the case. Keep in mind here that I'm speaking about close friends, like best friends, not all friends, if you're the type of person that has 30 close friends then this post might get a little tough for you, well, depending on your confidence level.
I tend to have a tough time discerning sometimes if something is going to be offensive or not to different people, no joke, I've legitimately cracked jokes, or pulled pranks on friends, colleges and etc thinking that they would find it funny only to offend a ton of people in the end, its a rather taxing flaw of mine. In High School though a friend came along, Lyle, and in college another friend, Crane, came along to aid me stop being a moron. These two guys have changed my life in the most significant of ways. You might call them "jerks" but these guys to me were "blunt realists", they constantly put me in my place and stopped me from doing a lot of stupid stuff. These are the perfect kind of friends to have, both were obnoxiously brilliant, both helped me grow exponentially and for some reason they both liked hanging out with me, good times for sure. This is what I mean though, I have a flaw, and in life have found friends that have aided me in this flaw, that's what having good friends is all about.
In Grad school I was blessed to have another friend like that show up in my life but this guy was actually a really nice guy, Mike, I like to call him my American dad. So as stated in the previous post I'm originally from Brazil, this meant that even when we moved here I never really had an "American" childhood. I never played catch, or went camping, or learned fishing, or worked on the car, or hunted, mine was a different type of childhood. This is where Mike has been a great aid in my life, not only did he teach me to play baseball but we joined a team and I got to score my first run, afterward I even got an icy, I never had one before, this might sound bizarre to you but it meant a lot to me, it was like finally getting to have these experiences. I've been a naturalized American for about two years now, but I'll tell you what, never have I felt more American then after playing baseball, getting an icy, and going home to watch "The Sandlot" for the first time, it was epic. I had good parents mind you, this is not a gripe about them, I love them dearly, but I've enjoyed learning from Mike, a great friend for sure.
One of the most essential type of friends to have and hold on to are the listeners within your life. You'll always find people that love to talk but those that love to listen, those are the ones you should always treasure for they are a rare breed and a valuable one at that. I can think of five people within my own life that fit this bill, 2 which are present right now and 3 that I've been friends with since High School. A fact of life is that you'll always have problems, you'll always go through tough times, and the best way to deal with your problems is to talk them out with people you trust, having friends that not only are good listeners but love you and care for you is a must in life. Too often do we hide our feelings and bottle up our emotions only to blow up later and cause more problems, thus I recommend you find a friend you can trust and vent to to your hearts content.
Having good close friends is a blessing and I hope that you'll be able to find some someday if you don't already have them. I hope your week has been going well and pray that you all stay safe.
Love from your humble blogger,